Friday, May 16, 2008

What if...

I was thinking, what if God operated like the government? I know it seems silly, but just what if? I have come up with a few things I think it would be like, and if you'd like to add yours, please join in the fun! (Just keep it light and no political party commentaries please.)

1. God would have sent a committee instead of Jesus.
2. You could not longer send in 10%, but instead would need to fill out complicated forms, although you would receive a tithing credit (not a full refund mind you) if you did improvements to your soul for better insulating against heat.
3. Instead of just 10 commandments that we can't seem to follow anyway, he would create a regulatory agency to oversee christianity and make sure we were in compliance. (or maybe Man already did this in the form of church)
4. Sampson would not be able to kick some major ass with the jaw of an ass as military regulations require a "high and tight" haircut.
5. Jesus would be required to secure a liquor license prior to making and serving alcoholic beverages at any party.
6. Armageddon or The Second Coming would be seen as dangerous to the environment, and a "environmental impact study" would have to be conducted prior to the event.
7. God could no longer feed 5000 people with a few fish and a couple of loaves of bread without first securing the proper permits for food handling and prep.
8. Jesus would have set on death row for 10 to 20 years, thereby delaying salvation for countless thousands.
............ ~npp


KellyLawson22 said...

Well, I think it's safe to say that would suck.


nonprofitprophet said...


MizAngie said...

I'm sorry but I cant' think about God's government until he sends me an incentive check...