It has been a really long time since I've entered a blog. About a month. Been thinking about it, planning on doing it, good intentions... but I'm tired. Worn out beat down road hard emotionally and mentally drained tired.
There are times in Life when I feel like I am at the top of a funnel. You know the kind you put fluids in and they swirl around. Life at the top of the funnel is fun, and open and big and new. But as the pressure increases, and I am forced through an ever decreasing size hole where I feel the sides closing in on me as I am forced into an even narrower and more forceful environment.
This is also known as cruch time. The endless drama of work and home, the demands of life (internal and external sources), and the consistant emphasis on getting it all done and doing it extremely well and being on a deadline.
Where did this all come from and why does it all hit and once?
There is, at present, a lull in the storm. I can still see it on the distant horizon - a huge storm cloud filled with dark billows, wild lightening and furious winds. I know that this presnt calmness is temporary, so i am blogging now.
I just got back from riding my motorcycle in the Quachita Mountains in Oklahoma. Was over a 500 mile trip in one day. It was good. It was Man on machine. Man in nature. Oneness, at least for a while. You can't answer the cell phone on a motorcycle - which is one of the main reasons I bought it. And this gave me physical tiredness, but mental clarity.
But it is Monday morning again. Back to legislation, policies, corporate drama, well intentioned church folks with ideas to bounce off of me, and personal crisis.
I know I am at the bottom of the funnel now, where I may finally escape through the narrow neck and exit into the great expanse of the unknown. Like the fluid, I hope to fulfill some greater destiny than just passing through the funnel. But if, as my motorcycle jacket patch says, "Its not the Destination, but the Journey" that matters, then I will have to find contentment in this.