I haven't been blogging much lately due to some health issues that came up. though i am not in the clear yet, I am feeling much better. Some of that has to do with some nice little pills the doctor gave me for stress. The other has to do with getting over the lil' viral bug that has been going around
but something else is also in the mix. a little peace of mind. maybe the pills are working or my irrational fears of the uncontrollable are diminishing. Either way, I'll take it.
I noticed something when I was praying about all of this and for others that are going through whatever life is throwing at them: I was always praying to God for Him to be with me. You know, "God be with me as I go through this test" or "God be with _____ as they go through ______". And I did this for a couple of weeks before I realized something: God Is Always With Us!. I know, not much of a revelation, but I was praying for Him to be with me during this or that and it just seemed stupid after I thought about it. I was praying for something that already exists. And I realized I've been doing this my whole life, even in church when I do the closing prayer, "Dear Lord, please watch over us and guide us and keep us..." and He is always watching over us.
So I changed my prayer this week. It now goes something like this: "God, please make me aware of your presence during these times of trouble and stress". I acknowledged that I do not Practice the Presence of God (to steal a book title from Brother Lawrence). I was asking Him to be with me when I needed Him, OR when I felt like I needed him, and was ignoring His presence the rest of the time.
Now I don't ignore that fact all of the time, its just i forget. And I think we all forget at times. Its hard to practice the presence of God at all times. Heck, if we actually did that we would probably not behave as we do at times. hmmmm. So there it is, my revelation of the week. I have been praying for something that I already had. Now I pray for awareness. ~npp
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3 comments:
ahhh...awareness. It's a good thing. I remember when this same "ah-ha" occured for me. I was taught to ask for God to be with me/us. I gre up hearing standard phrases that asked for God's presence or for God to watch over us. I think this idea had always been hovering in my mind, but it really settled in me during the months before my father's death. No need for the story, but my prayer became, " just help us to know you're here; feel that you're with us." Praying for awareness has become my default prayer know. Since prayer is still much of a mystery, sometimes this is all I really know to pray for. Even still, it's a pretty good one.
KJ - yes, its seems so apparent but i guess its something we grow up with and then become aware of. glad i'm not alone in this awareness. ~npp
amen and hallelujah ... It's always with us ... i just forget ...
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