I got the following email from a friend today:
"Our lives are the only Bible some people will ever read.
Watch your thoughts; they become words.
Watch your words; they become actions.
Watch your actions; they become habits.
Watch your habits; they become character.
Watch your character; it becomes your destiny."
I have been teaching on how our every action, deed, and thought becomes a composite of who we are. Little things we do in life, over time, that defines us to ourselves, our place in history, and to those around us. We are what we eat theory.
One person asked me what i thought about porn. My only response was that anything that causes you to become less than what you are, that becomes an addiction you can't shake, is bad. Not because "what it is", but more so how it controls you: Anger, Resentment, Porn, Food, Sex, Wine, Smoking, NASCAR, whatever...
I went and saw "Mr. Brooks" last weekend at the movies. Kevin Costner plays a seriel killer who is addicted to killing. He gets off on it. Goes to AA and claims to be an addict, only no one there knows what kind of addict. He knows he has a problem, but can't shake it because it controls him. It has taken on a personality all its own that actually persuades him to do this act or that act. Its scary.
Mine is cynicism. It controls me. Gets the best of me. Makes me quick to fire off a remark. It is good, but to a point it gets bad. It affects all aspects of my life: family, marriage, kids, work, church. Most of the time I am right about something, but my approach, my response to the situation comes across as cras.
And then I get this email. And it reminds me that I do claim this label of "Christian". Not because I am holier than thou, not because I have it all figured out, not because I know the scriptures, but because somewhere in my life, my childhood, this Jesus fellow was presented to me as real. As a way of life that can't be topped. That I should do this or that because it is True, it is Real, it is Love.
I cannot change this.
I hope my life, the only bible some people will read, readily reflects this.
Saturday, June 23, 2007
Thursday, June 21, 2007
Big Dick Theory
Okay, this has absolutely nothing to do with those spam emails for male enlargement. I'm smiling enough as it is so no problem.
Many years ago, in my wednesday morning men's group (called the Wards Boys, don't even get me started on why its called that, more like promise keepers gone bad) it seemed that everyone was getting their turn with crap happening to them. Not run of the mill life stuff, but actual BS to deal with - death, divorce, financial issues, moving, etc. We dubbed it "Big Dick Theory", that there was a giant dick just floating around the universe looking for the next person it could "f" up and ruin their day, week, life, etc.
One Wednesday morning one of the guys walks in and announces he has seen the big dick. Seems his office had some duct work issues, so they removed all of the ceiling tiles and were replacing the ventilation ducting. Since they hadn't finished, they left their work "as is", as in a big tubular section of duct hanging down from the ceiling and aiming right at his desk. I think he took a picture.
Many of us have experienced this phenomenon and thought "why me"? Like the little rain cloud that just seems to follow only you. But I know it happens to everyone, different severity maybe, but everyone has their stuff that happens. I used to think that some folks lived charmed lives (and on a comparison scale maybe so), but its all relative to your own place in life.
I have fought back against the demons over the years. Sometimes they win - sometimes not. But I don't look at it as the Big Dick Theory anymore. Its just life. Some lumps are harder than others. I just tend to deal with them differently now.
I'm not sure if my approach will work for the long run, but the Big Dick seems to have Erectile Dysfunction as of late - and that is just fine with me.
Many years ago, in my wednesday morning men's group (called the Wards Boys, don't even get me started on why its called that, more like promise keepers gone bad) it seemed that everyone was getting their turn with crap happening to them. Not run of the mill life stuff, but actual BS to deal with - death, divorce, financial issues, moving, etc. We dubbed it "Big Dick Theory", that there was a giant dick just floating around the universe looking for the next person it could "f" up and ruin their day, week, life, etc.
One Wednesday morning one of the guys walks in and announces he has seen the big dick. Seems his office had some duct work issues, so they removed all of the ceiling tiles and were replacing the ventilation ducting. Since they hadn't finished, they left their work "as is", as in a big tubular section of duct hanging down from the ceiling and aiming right at his desk. I think he took a picture.
Many of us have experienced this phenomenon and thought "why me"? Like the little rain cloud that just seems to follow only you. But I know it happens to everyone, different severity maybe, but everyone has their stuff that happens. I used to think that some folks lived charmed lives (and on a comparison scale maybe so), but its all relative to your own place in life.
I have fought back against the demons over the years. Sometimes they win - sometimes not. But I don't look at it as the Big Dick Theory anymore. Its just life. Some lumps are harder than others. I just tend to deal with them differently now.
I'm not sure if my approach will work for the long run, but the Big Dick seems to have Erectile Dysfunction as of late - and that is just fine with me.
Monday, June 4, 2007
Tired
It has been a really long time since I've entered a blog. About a month. Been thinking about it, planning on doing it, good intentions... but I'm tired. Worn out beat down road hard emotionally and mentally drained tired.
There are times in Life when I feel like I am at the top of a funnel. You know the kind you put fluids in and they swirl around. Life at the top of the funnel is fun, and open and big and new. But as the pressure increases, and I am forced through an ever decreasing size hole where I feel the sides closing in on me as I am forced into an even narrower and more forceful environment.
This is also known as cruch time. The endless drama of work and home, the demands of life (internal and external sources), and the consistant emphasis on getting it all done and doing it extremely well and being on a deadline.
Where did this all come from and why does it all hit and once?
There is, at present, a lull in the storm. I can still see it on the distant horizon - a huge storm cloud filled with dark billows, wild lightening and furious winds. I know that this presnt calmness is temporary, so i am blogging now.
I just got back from riding my motorcycle in the Quachita Mountains in Oklahoma. Was over a 500 mile trip in one day. It was good. It was Man on machine. Man in nature. Oneness, at least for a while. You can't answer the cell phone on a motorcycle - which is one of the main reasons I bought it. And this gave me physical tiredness, but mental clarity.
But it is Monday morning again. Back to legislation, policies, corporate drama, well intentioned church folks with ideas to bounce off of me, and personal crisis.
I know I am at the bottom of the funnel now, where I may finally escape through the narrow neck and exit into the great expanse of the unknown. Like the fluid, I hope to fulfill some greater destiny than just passing through the funnel. But if, as my motorcycle jacket patch says, "Its not the Destination, but the Journey" that matters, then I will have to find contentment in this.
There are times in Life when I feel like I am at the top of a funnel. You know the kind you put fluids in and they swirl around. Life at the top of the funnel is fun, and open and big and new. But as the pressure increases, and I am forced through an ever decreasing size hole where I feel the sides closing in on me as I am forced into an even narrower and more forceful environment.
This is also known as cruch time. The endless drama of work and home, the demands of life (internal and external sources), and the consistant emphasis on getting it all done and doing it extremely well and being on a deadline.
Where did this all come from and why does it all hit and once?
There is, at present, a lull in the storm. I can still see it on the distant horizon - a huge storm cloud filled with dark billows, wild lightening and furious winds. I know that this presnt calmness is temporary, so i am blogging now.
I just got back from riding my motorcycle in the Quachita Mountains in Oklahoma. Was over a 500 mile trip in one day. It was good. It was Man on machine. Man in nature. Oneness, at least for a while. You can't answer the cell phone on a motorcycle - which is one of the main reasons I bought it. And this gave me physical tiredness, but mental clarity.
But it is Monday morning again. Back to legislation, policies, corporate drama, well intentioned church folks with ideas to bounce off of me, and personal crisis.
I know I am at the bottom of the funnel now, where I may finally escape through the narrow neck and exit into the great expanse of the unknown. Like the fluid, I hope to fulfill some greater destiny than just passing through the funnel. But if, as my motorcycle jacket patch says, "Its not the Destination, but the Journey" that matters, then I will have to find contentment in this.
Wednesday, May 2, 2007
car accidents
Several months ago, a young high school girl was driving home when she was struck by a drunk driver. It appeared she would not make it. The phones and emails began to churn prayer requests and people prayed fervently. Life flighted to a larger hospital, it was touch and go. A website was set up for people to leave comments and check on her progress. Everyone was praying to God for healing and the family. Days passed and she got better, people praised God. Weeks passed and progress was slow, people still praised God. Months later she is doing much better and all the Posts thanks God for this and that.
Great. Really Great.
Tuesday, a 17 year old friend of our family, who lives about 8 miles from the above girl, was returning home when he lost control of his vehicle and was struck by another car. Killed instantly. No chance, no time, no hope.
Now, both families were interestingly similar. Church goers, financially well off, good kids. Seemingly apples to apples comparison. So why did one die and the other live. Will both parents be praising God? Was his will done? Was that it?
I dare not try to understand the why's of any of this, for I don't think it can be comprehended, and would drive me even further insane than I already am.
Faith, Trust, Hope, Love - intermingled amongst questions and confusion.
Great. Really Great.
Tuesday, a 17 year old friend of our family, who lives about 8 miles from the above girl, was returning home when he lost control of his vehicle and was struck by another car. Killed instantly. No chance, no time, no hope.
Now, both families were interestingly similar. Church goers, financially well off, good kids. Seemingly apples to apples comparison. So why did one die and the other live. Will both parents be praising God? Was his will done? Was that it?
I dare not try to understand the why's of any of this, for I don't think it can be comprehended, and would drive me even further insane than I already am.
Faith, Trust, Hope, Love - intermingled amongst questions and confusion.
Thursday, April 26, 2007
start my own church?
I got this email today from a person in my sunday school class that I teach weekly, totally unsolicited and so totally cool... I wanted to share...
I had an idea for you:
YOu could start your own church and call it the Messy Christian Church
and you could put up signs that say "We don't have the answers.....come join us"
..We are followers of Jesus...........and we stumble all the time.......come join us"
PS We even drink beer sometimes ;)
I had an idea for you:
YOu could start your own church and call it the Messy Christian Church
and you could put up signs that say "We don't have the answers.....come join us"
..We are followers of Jesus...........and we stumble all the time.......come join us"
PS We even drink beer sometimes ;)
Premium Outlet Mall
Recently I went to my first Premium Outlet Mall. I wasn't sure what I'd find but hey, its an Outlet Mall, home of the fabulously low deal on stuff you gotta have. I walk the concrete, glancing from side to side at the brand names... Gucci, Vans, Ralph Lauren, and stores I haven't heard of before.
I walk into some store, either Burberry (spelling?) or Coach (cause I had no idea what they were) and it was a store full of purses, and wallets, and coin purses, and stuff. I look over to my right and on a table was a small coin purse. Now what was impressive about this coin purse was not the design. Nothing special there. It wasn't a fancy color. What was impressive was that this thing cost $103 and some change. And it pissed me off. Instantly. And I wondered why it made me so mad.
I thought about it. Initially because it costs so much and I knew someone would buy it. And I figure that person who bought it would place it inside a much larger overpriced purse and take it to church with them. And yes, that pissed me off as well. So much need in the world, so much good that would do, and someone calling themselves a Christian would spend money on this. And I was angry. I could not even use the biblical story where the girl poured the expensive perfume on the feet of Jesus and the disciples chastised her ... because it was done out of love. An extravagent love.
I probably waste money on stuff as well that could go to help feed hungry people or whatever. But that isn't what really made me angry. It is that we have been sold a huge lie. We are buying into an image that isn't real. The rise of Abercrombie, Tommy Hilfigher, etc. somehow makes us proud to show off how much money we spent on stuff and then advertise it to the world. "look at me - I have 'x' name brand this or that". It is either so show we can afford it, or to keep up with what the world considers hip, or some image we wish to portray.
Or maybe its class warfare. Honda Accords were the thing in the early 80s. When everyone started to afford them, they come up with Acura. Toyotas - Lexus, Isuzu - Infinity. You catch up with a Suburban? Not good enough cause now we have topped that with Escalade. You get my drift - same product, different label to separate the haves from the can't affords.
I have always had an aversion to labels. Whether it be on my clothes or attached to my person. Whether Jew or Gentile or Samaritan. If we as a culture really think that what matters is on the outside, attached to a label or defined by price tag, I can't see where we have made any progress.
And yes. Look around at church. You will see these labels. And its a shame. I think I'll have a chardonay and set in my sauna and think about it before heading out to the golf course.
I walk into some store, either Burberry (spelling?) or Coach (cause I had no idea what they were) and it was a store full of purses, and wallets, and coin purses, and stuff. I look over to my right and on a table was a small coin purse. Now what was impressive about this coin purse was not the design. Nothing special there. It wasn't a fancy color. What was impressive was that this thing cost $103 and some change. And it pissed me off. Instantly. And I wondered why it made me so mad.
I thought about it. Initially because it costs so much and I knew someone would buy it. And I figure that person who bought it would place it inside a much larger overpriced purse and take it to church with them. And yes, that pissed me off as well. So much need in the world, so much good that would do, and someone calling themselves a Christian would spend money on this. And I was angry. I could not even use the biblical story where the girl poured the expensive perfume on the feet of Jesus and the disciples chastised her ... because it was done out of love. An extravagent love.
I probably waste money on stuff as well that could go to help feed hungry people or whatever. But that isn't what really made me angry. It is that we have been sold a huge lie. We are buying into an image that isn't real. The rise of Abercrombie, Tommy Hilfigher, etc. somehow makes us proud to show off how much money we spent on stuff and then advertise it to the world. "look at me - I have 'x' name brand this or that". It is either so show we can afford it, or to keep up with what the world considers hip, or some image we wish to portray.
Or maybe its class warfare. Honda Accords were the thing in the early 80s. When everyone started to afford them, they come up with Acura. Toyotas - Lexus, Isuzu - Infinity. You catch up with a Suburban? Not good enough cause now we have topped that with Escalade. You get my drift - same product, different label to separate the haves from the can't affords.
I have always had an aversion to labels. Whether it be on my clothes or attached to my person. Whether Jew or Gentile or Samaritan. If we as a culture really think that what matters is on the outside, attached to a label or defined by price tag, I can't see where we have made any progress.
And yes. Look around at church. You will see these labels. And its a shame. I think I'll have a chardonay and set in my sauna and think about it before heading out to the golf course.
Thursday, April 19, 2007
I stand corrected!
I did the Santa Claus Jesus thing this week. I know, I know - HYPOCRITE! But hey, I was desperate and didn't know what else to do or where else to turn. All reason or semblance of sanity seemed to have disappeared, so what was a good soul to do? If you read my earlier post about Santa Claus Jesus, you know how I feel about it. But something had to be done.
Sanjaya. Sanjaya from American Idol had continued to mock my world. Caused serious doubts to arise in my mind about the hearing abilities of millions of Americans. I could not help myself. I went down on my knees and prayed. "Dear Jesus, please let this be the night. Please let Sanjaya get voted off of American Idol".
Now I wasn't completely off my rocker. I didn't bargain with God by offering this or that. Nope, just asked for something. Something simple. And it HAPPENED! Oh My GOD! Its true. Santa Claus Jesus delivered and Sanjaya is now eligible for TV GUIDE Chat.
Santa Claus Jesus. I stand corrected. ;)
Sanjaya. Sanjaya from American Idol had continued to mock my world. Caused serious doubts to arise in my mind about the hearing abilities of millions of Americans. I could not help myself. I went down on my knees and prayed. "Dear Jesus, please let this be the night. Please let Sanjaya get voted off of American Idol".
Now I wasn't completely off my rocker. I didn't bargain with God by offering this or that. Nope, just asked for something. Something simple. And it HAPPENED! Oh My GOD! Its true. Santa Claus Jesus delivered and Sanjaya is now eligible for TV GUIDE Chat.
Santa Claus Jesus. I stand corrected. ;)
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